i'm in love with lesbians.

i kind of have a huge crush on rachel maddow. i have for a long time.

i dont even know what's going on in this video. i just really like to watch her talk in all her butchness and awkward sarcasm.

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sorry

another thing i saw in time that i thought was super interesting, that i'm in love with.

why do other developed countries seem to be so much more conscious, respectful and willing to make changes to their own lives for the greater good than this country? sometimes i just want to move to a country like that, but even more i wish we could just become a country like that. i wish we could stop acting like we are all in it for ourselves. we float together or sink together, when will we really understand this?

p.s. not sorry at all.

damn healthcare

ok, so i haven't heard one legitimate reason why people are upset about health care reform. the only complaints i've heard have been things that have been shown to be lies... so any of my friends or even people who read that i dont know personally who are rational, calm, intelligent people that disagree with health care reform or with all that's going on with this health bill or plan etc... i'd like to know the reasons. reasons that haven't been exposed as lies. i'm seriously asking, because i dont get it. is it just that you dont want governemnt involved? if that's it then before you tell me i have to ask you to think about how the government controls the postal service, or the fire department... do you want those to become private businesses? if so why?

secondly i keep hearing people talk about how canada's health care system is terrible and the same with the UK. the only people i've heard this from are right wing americans. i'd like to hear what ANYONE from those places has to say about their healthcare. i know that a couple hundred of you from both the UK and Canada read ... so i'd like you to speak up. if you'd rather email me that's cool too (ibloomblaum@hotmail.com). i've never heard anything bad about your systems from anyone i know living in those places, so if theres bad, i'd like to hear it from you. if you love it, i'd like to hear that too. i'm just sick of people acting like you all hate your healthcare and its the worst when not only does your care rank above ours, you also have lower infant mortality rates, amazing coverage for mothers, no one dies because they cant get healthcare, and you all, on average, live longer. so please, let me hear from you. i'm begging you. please. i'd also love to hear your perspective on our country and our healthcare system as much as you know about it. .... ok... thanks! please write!

ugh

wait, did you quit so you could spend more time doing this? i mean... is this why you didn't quit....?

have a glass of wine

and then chill the fuck out.

ok, first of all i'm SO sick of people calling each other "un-american"... i mean can you really call another american unamerican? for things like shouting? no.... for things like torture that go against our constitution, i'll give you that nancy, but shouting... lets chill out.

that being said... can the shouting stop? and can you stop acting like you dont have freedom of speech because the opposing side would like you to debate and ask questions like an educated adult? i mean really. lets grow up.

the only other thing i'd like to say about what im hearing about this health care debate is that if you are pro-life and you think its crazy that you could end up paying for other peoples abortions under a government plan, realize that you ALREADY do through your private insurance and then get a grip. i dont want to pay for women to have elected c-sections they dont need, i dont want to pay for people to have 5 damn kids when i think they should stick to 1 or 2... but those are my opinions and that is their right... so i pay and in return i receive the care i want and have the right to, including the right to have an abortion that is covered by my insurance.

oh and i guess one more thing.... if you are going to flip about about something, make sure its true first. its super annoying and just makes you look like an uneducated ass when you dont know what the hell you're talking about.

i'm not saying i'm for this health bill, i'm just saying stop listening to fox, cause their insane idiots making wild untrue accusations (i think they have a quota for how many people or groups of people that they have to call 'Nazis' every year), then have legitimate arguments and bring them to the table like mature adults.

alls we have to do

keep it light

well this is what i look like while i'm writing this post, so dont take it tooooooo seriously.

i was watching everybody loves raymond, and a commercial came on for house. it was a commercial for a rerun i think, i dont know because i dont watch that show, it looks crazy boring to me.

anyway the commercial was about an episode where there's a man who is dying that is in prison for killing four people and they're debating whether to save him or not. immediately it made me think about what i would do, what "should" be done etc. i thought of all this mainly because seth has actually brought this kind of thing up recently a couple times. i know he's had some conversations with some of his friends lately about when killing is 'right' or if it ever is.

i'm sure most of you know that i fully support abortion being legal and if i found myself in a position where i felt that was my best option, wouldn't be opposed to going that route. first of all i have to say this just so the argument doesn't end up about abortion, because that's not really what we've been discussing and there are two things i need to say about abortion just to make clear why its not really something i'm interested in talking about... one is that to me its not necessarily killing someone, the jury is still out on that one for me, and two is that i dont necessarily think its 'right' per say.. im just not opposed to doing things i think are 'wrong' or could be considered wrong by others or even myself if the situation calls for it.

ok so moving on... i dont agree with there being a death penalty. it seems strange to me to dispose of people because they made choices that hurt others. i certainly believe that people should be punished for doing horrific things, but death seems very drastic. so hopeless. like once you've done something all of us decide we can't forgive, we're done with you, we decide that you have no hope and nothing left to offer anyone. its a weird idea for me because on one hand i totally understand the argument seth puts forward, which is that killing is wrong in any situation. across the board. never ever right. ever. killing for what you determine is justice does not make killing right. so on one hand i agree, i feel like i get that point and even if you feel justice when you kill because that person has wronged so terribly not only does that not make the action of taking someone else's life ok, but who are you to determine what justice is? there are people who want to kill others because they believe god told them to, that their god wants them to. in their minds, this is justice. to us it is terrorism. if a man killed your child and you killed him to you it is justice, to his family or ones who loved him it is still wrong despite his wrongs. this doesn't mean seth doesn't understand the idea that people kill for 'justice', he just believes it doesn't make it right.

now at the same time i have a hard time agreeing completely because it is SOOOOOO ridiculously hard for me to even decide that something is 'wrong'. using the words wrong and right is one of the hardest things to do for me. in my mind there are choices that are better for you than others, but not necessarily right or wrong... and even when i believe something is wrong, that doesn't make it wrong. that just makes it my own conviction. we have decided as a society that killing is 'wrong', but really what we are saying is that its not best for us, in certain arenas. it doesn't make things any better, it usually makes things worse, not just for the people who's families get someone ripped out of them but for the ones who kill and find something cold inside of them that will never go away.

again, at the same time as thinking of all of this i think about how i, myself, believe that oppressing another persons rights is wrong.... haha... seriously though.... so oppressing someones rights to the same things you decide you have rights to in my mind is wrong. its injustice. its not just not whats best for both parties but i feel that it is actually injustice. me believing this doesn't make it true. to me there's not much that i believe is right or wrong. i define righ and wrong like this: there is only what is better for me, what will make me grow, move forward, be a better person and love better. there is only what is better for our society, what will make us grow, move forward, be a better people and teach us to love each other better. but even then i am deciding what i think will make me or my society better, and a thousand other people will see it the opposite way. we have decided collectively that we believe killing is wrong.... at the same time, we have decided it is very acceptable and very necessary. i'm certainly a person who believes in government, rule and order. which is very contradictory to my own nature, because i dont see in black and white. is the only answer that things that are wrong are just sometimes necessary?

i want to know what people's views are on this. obviously i think myself back and forth and i have a stance, but my stance leaves me with no true black and white... which is exactly where i usually am.

so hilar.

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furious.

to every single person who has said they dont want gay marriage to be legal because they dont want it taught to their children in school....

i'm horrified.

this has made me so frustrated i can't even express it. for my own reasons this makes me angry, but watching oprah today made me furious.

the two young boys who's mothers talked to oprah today about losing their sons to suicide were bullied, manly because the bullies thought they were gay.

this is the kind of hate that will continue to breed in a hostile environment. the only way to lessen hate is to teach acceptance. when will you closed minded ignorant judges change your ways and learn to let others be? why do you feel so threatened at people being different than you?

i want same sex marriage to be legal for so many reasons, but this is the biggest reason to me... if our children keep learning that marriage is only right one way then we will only continue to breed intolerance and ignorance.

the truth of the matter is, no matter what marriage is to you or me, to some it is a union between two men or two women. this is love to some people, this is their life, this is them... we HAVE to figure out a way to accept that. i dont mean in a 'i love them i just dont love what they do' kind of way... i mean in a real way, in a way where we wholly accept them and allow them to have the rights we feel we deserve. this is not just for them, it is for us as a society, for our future. so that hopefully we can move towards more love and more acceptance and farther away from me being right and you being wrong (and that being all that matters). if you dont teach your children that people can love differently than them and should still have the rights they themselves enjoy, then i truly hope someone else will teach your child that.


(and just so i dont get any arguments with these stances:
yes i think plural marriage should be legal.
within the range of adulthood (whatever age we as a society decide that to be)two consenting adults (or more), i believe, should be allowed to love who they want and be able to express that in the same ways i am allowed to. )

create me, kill me just dont clone me

all this has brought up questions that i think are good for all of us to ask ourselves...

its interesting to me that ivf could have been seen as something not controversial by some. i think it is clearly something that some people think is great and some people think is as scary as cloning. i think its interesting that christians would feel so strongly about something that others would see as trying to take control out of Gods hands and put it in our own... trying to be the ones who create life when its not coming from above.

my questions are.. who does create life? is it just God? if we have learned how through ivf, through cloning... does this mean we create life now too? or was that god? i know that no one knows these answers, but we all come to conclusions about what we think about it and that's why we have different opinions on things like in vitro fertilization, cloning, stem cells and abortion. it does seem silly to me to be so for in vitro fertilization and so against abortion, its ok to create life but not take it away? either way you are the one in control now, not God. in my opinion. i dont think either should be outlawed, but i dont think either is an ideal situation and both are looked at as more or less responsible compared to the other from different perspectives. i think people should certainly be allowed to have in vitro fertilization although i dont agree with it. i think people should be allowed to have abortions although i think they are sad and painful.

what we do with our bodies i believe is our business but in these situations it affects other people greatly, it even affects society as a whole. its good to think about these things and where we stand on them, not only for our own souls but in order to decide what kind of a society we want to be a part of and in turn choose to create around us.

as the line between who creates life ... between who takes life away... between who heals blurs more these questions will only become more of a concern in all of our lives. how do we want to deal with them? whether heated or not i love talking or starting conversation about issues like this because we could all afford to think more about the issues that shape who we become as a society.

who do you think creates life?
within cloning or ivf does your answer change?

i'd rather wear you than eat you.

i dont understand.

i do understand if someone is against fur, leather and eating meat.

what i dont understand is...

when people hate fur or like celebrities who are against fur but dont say anything about leather or eating meat. if your reason is the animals, isnt it all bad?

i dont eat meat cause i think its gross, not because of the animals (though i do think they should be treated better).

i dont mind wearing fur, as long as its vintage... that way whats done is done. me not wearing it isnt going to change it, i might as well still look hot in it.. and i dont mind leather either but i dont really wear it unless its on vintage shoes also.

i do have to say in the end if i had to choose id rather wear a carcass than eat it.


anyway i just think its weird that there's all this outrage against fur and not leather or eating meat. its all the same.

my rights. your wrongs.

when do my rights become an other's oppression?
when do my beliefs?
when does love?

if someone fights for their freedom alone they don't oppress others.
if someone fights for the right to snuff ones freedoms, they have become the oppressor.

people get confused about where i stand when it comes to everyone's right to their beliefs. i believe that people have the right to believe in whatever they choose, i'm not going to tell them its wrong with only one exception, i believe that the only things i can clearly say are wrong to someone else are things that will physically hurt another person or living being. at the same time i believe that when we exercise our beliefs, we need to be careful to allow others theirs. if my belief system says you are wrong that's ok, but i'm not going to take action against what you believe, unless it hurts someone.

should what i believe be what all others around me live by?
i dont think that is true and i dont believe that is love.
i dont want someone else's convictions to define my life, so why should my convictions define theirs?

for me love is letting people be who they are and allowing them the freedom to choose what they life for, all people deserve the same rights i have whether i think they are wrong or right.

i see now, that this is not what all would consider love. somehow people can see love in changing others to fit better with themselves.

what is love? who even defines what it is?

this subject is hard for me to write about, because i feel i can't convey exactly what i'm trying to say in typed letters. its also a hard subject for me in life, because no matter how many people i talk to the mentality of making laws to fit just your beliefs does not make sense. i dont get the mentality of love being one where you dont accept parts of a person because they dont align with your morals.

people being oppressed in any way breaks my heart. it creates a deep ache inside me that i can physically feel. what makes it worse is when people i love dearly support oppression, how do i reconcile that? its not 'oh you just believe what you believe' its ... 'what you believe oppresses another and strips them of their rights, their beliefs, of acceptance' and i dont know how to understand that. i dont know how to make it okay, i dont know how to ignore it.

these are the kinds of things that make me feel like i need to move farther and farther away from christianity. i dont know if this is how jesus was, if these things are what he wanted his followers to do i dont want to be a part of that.. i dont believe that he was like that... but its all i see.

government... a family member in need?

i was reading about arabellas savings bonds to see what i needed to do for them and how they accrue and all .... and the other day i got the letter the gov sent out to everyone telling them about the extra money we’ll get from the economic stimulus package and i just keep having this feeling like our government is my broke family member who’s in debt and keeps trying to buy stuff or give me presents and i know they dont really have it to give.... its that awkward like, ’oh thanks for the gift cerificate, but i feel really awkward cause i know you’re in a lot of financial trouble and probably shouldn’t be giving this to me’ ... besides that do we really think this is going to ’stimulate’ our economy? most people are in such financial trouble they’re going to save it or pay off debt with it..... not go buy more crap they can’t afford... i (kind of?) hope anyway. its really a catch 22. buy more things we can’t afford and stay in debt, keep being consumers trapped by interest, bad loans and false credit ... or stimulate our economy with the lowly amount of 600-1200 bucks and hopefully reverse this recession? something in me tells me, this isn’t the solution..... but i am glad to have an extra 1200+ whatever extra for having a child... its going straight to our carefully written already in action ’pay off all debt this year’ plan. exciting.

our country needs to schedule a meeting with suze orman. asap.


oh georgie porgie.