Sunday, July 6, 2008

being pregnant.

is not my cup of tea this time. i LOVED it with ara, but this time i just dont really like it.. physically i dont feel pregnant and most of this 5 months i haven't felt pregnant emotionally but lately i have and i HATE it. i just want to be myself again. i feel crappy right now, sad, lonely, upset, i just love seth and i love arabella.... i wanna bring her in bed with me tonight... but i know i can't. ugh.

1 comment:

Marianne Elixir said...

When I was pregnant with #2, I had really mixed emotions. On the one hand, we had planned to get pregnant, and so it was an exciting thing (kinda), but the whole time I started regretting the spacing and timing in our life and wishing we weren't so damn fertile (talking about being willing to have a kid basically gets me pregnant).

I couldn't fathom how I would actually love another child. I just didn't know if I had it in me, truly. I mean, I knew I would go through the motions, but I didn't feel sure that I would feel it...
Anyhow, I now, of course, ADORE my 2nd (in fact, some days worry he might be my favorite), but I do understand where you are coming from, and I think it's pretty normal. Don't sweat it!