pagan christianity

so this is the book i have been reading, my in laws got it for us.... and i read it for two hours the night i got it, which is the opposite of something i would normally do... but i LOVE it. its so much of exactly how i’ve felt for so long, but didnt know exactly how to communicate and it explains so much more of why i feel so uncomfortable with the traditional way of church.... i’ve felt for so long like it just doesn’t really make sense with the bible, and the idea of one guy standing up there and talking seemed like the most foreign way to learn about God, the bible, anything like that.... and dont even get me started on ’worship’ that has been the WEIRDEST thing to me, so uncomfortable and really just something i do not get. i’m only half way through this book right now but so far i really like it, a lot of the churches it describes are really extreme to me, compared to the kind of churches i used to go to, but i know most churches are actually like the ones he describes... anyway it made me not feel bad about not liking church and yea i have hard time with getting grossed out by church and some of that is because of mercy but a lot of it is just because i really really do feel like its this weird man made institution that we call ’gods house’ and its not. its hard to even put all of this into words for me .. if i was talking it would be easy.. anyway the way he describes the real meaning of ’church’ as jesus and his apostles would have known it is what has been my heart for the past two years and when i’ve been in those kinds of gatherings its really been the most amazing times of my life. its hard to describe the difference for people to understand unless they go.....

at so many times i’ve wanted to start that at my house, a brunch every sunday morning, or maybe during the week in the evening have dinner and then all talk... i think we should start it, i need it again, and theres no where around here with anyone i know doing it.... plus it would be hard for us to go places in the evening with arabella, anyway i’ll talk to seth about it, and maybe we’ll start it up here, if people will come to atascadero! i know how you stinkers are....