Friday, January 9, 2009

i'm so sick

of weirdness.

and feeling 'cut out'.

we aren't invited to our friends wedding. he is my ex, from 5 and half years ago. he is good friends with seth and we have had nothing but a nice respectful relationship since we broke up... i wouldnt think of him as an 'ex' i just think of him as an old friend. anyway i know that most people aren't like me when it comes to this, blah blah blah, but it just really stresses me out how everyone seems to be on the defense when it comes to their relationships.... yet there's no offense. seth was really sad about it because he considers this person a good friend... i'm sad because i've always tried to maintain good/cordial relationships with people i have dated, and people seth has dated, because they're not just 'exes' they're a part of our life story, a part of our history and a part of who we are today. i understand his position, because he has to respect his soon to be wife, i dont understand her position... i would if like.. him and i talked a lot maybe? or if we dated like last year? or if i wasn't married? or if i was married but didn't have two kids? if she had met me when i looked super hot not when i was super knocked up?.... anyway this kind of thing just stresses me out inside, it makes me feel sick and yucky. we are all people and we're just people trying to love other people... so until there's need for a good defense, lets put down our guns and be friends? because i'm not out to get anyones man, especially one i've dated... that super super didn't work out... i just want to have good relationships with people around me. i want to love.

i feel sad inside.

5 comments:

Erin said...

I understand because I really want to still be friend with the only ex I ever had and he doesn't want to, despite promises of staying friend for ever. It makes me feel really sad inside.

Flo Paris said...

That's stupid.

Shannon said...

I feel you-I've always been chill about ex's both mine and whoever I'm with at the time. But I'm pretty alone, every one thinks I'm weird for it and always wants to make a big deal out of nothing. Even after being married four years there have still been moments including, "Well it's hard for her to have us be friends because we dated-you know in 7th grade, remember that month we dated?" Hahaha. I just keep being me. This couple is missing out on a great friendship and that's definitely their problem.

LAKES said...

dude, you can come to my wedding anytime. for reals.

Andrea Terry said...

Booo. That's lame. Some people just need to relax and let things go. And I don't mean you.